A Story of Courage
This story is about my Dad, a man who showed courage throughout his entire life. Born with quite a profound disability, he never let that define him, hinder him or stop him from having a sense of humour. I only ever knew my Dad as a ‘disabled person’; because that’s how everyone described him. But to me he was a man full of courage, determination and encouragement. So when he developed Cancer, it absolutely floored me. But as with everything he tackled in life, this was not going to stop him.
The surgeon told my Dad that they would carry out the surgery to remove the tumour on Tuesday. To which my Dad said “well that’s good, because I play cards on Fridays”. The Doctor laughed with us and knew he had a fighter on his hands. The surgery did indeed go ahead just before Christmas and just over two weeks later on Christmas Eve, my Dad was home. Of course he was still recovering, but he did it with no fuss and definitely no self-pity.
Fast forward about four years and my Dad had been Cancer free for all of this time. He was having regular check-ups and all was good. That was until he developed a pain in his arm that just wouldn’t go away. He saw the GP on many occasions and he was reassured it was simply muscular pain. However, the worst happened. The Cancer had returned in his bones and this time there was no plan to recover, or treatment available. My Dad being the man he was didn’t want to go through the hideous process of Chemotherapy and chose to let the Cancer take its course.
The Cancer was taking hold and it was evident that my Dad was suffering. But as always, he didn’t complain or feel any kind of self-pity, he took it in his stride. There came a point where his pain wasn’t being managed well and we suggested he go into the local hospice to try to achieve better pain management which would mean he wasn’t suffering unnecessarily. He did indeed go into the Hospice and I will never forget the look on his face when he went in. It was wonderful (in a strange and comforting way). The views of the sea were wonderful and he was treated like a human and with dignity.
We visited my Dad almost every day and he remained positive and always managed to laugh. He kept the staff busy and on their toes. On one occasion that I visited (I will forever hold this courageous moment in my heart) my Dad was in stitches laughing. I loved seeing this. And this was the man I knew and loved so dearly. I said “what’s funny Dad”. He couldn’t speak for laughing. Eventually, he told me that during the morning routine of getting patients dressed, washed and ready for the day, the nurse looking after him asked where his shoe had gone. He said “I don’t know; it was there earlier”! At this point the nurse asked the other staff members if they had seen it to which they said no and they all began searching for the shoe. The nurse that was looking after my Dad said “Bert, we can’t find your shoe anywhere”. To which my Dad shook his trouser leg and being an amputee, he wasn’t actually wearing his leg. The nurse found this hilarious and my Dad being the comedian he was, laughed and laughed. As he was telling me the story the nurses came into the ward and were listening and again laughed genuine tears of laughter. The leg, with said shoe was in actual fact in my car on my parcel shelf.
It’s a short story, but a story of courage and humility. No matter what you are going through, a sense of humour can get you through even the darkest of times. As I go through life, I will recall moments such as this as they show me that I can get through anything. My Dad lost his battle not too long after this but he remained strong and courageous until his last breath.